How and When to Talk to Your Kids About Sex
Accurate Sexual Health Information for Children of All Ages
May 26, 2009
When it comes to teaching children about sex, parents can carry a lot of baggage from their own experiences learning about sex. Whether you are embarrassed, uncomfortable or simply don't know what words to use and when to start talking about sex with your children, The New Speaking of Sex [Northstone Publishing, 2005. ISBN-10: 1896836704] by Meg Hickling, R.N. is a great resource for parents.
When Do Kids Need to Know About Sex?
Parents of preschoolers might be sitting back, thinking "my child is too young to need to know about sex yet," but according to Hickling, talking with children about sex during the preschool years is the best time to start. Young children are ready to absorb all kinds of information about the world, and most are lacking any baggage or preconceptions about sex. Talking to young children about sex also tells them that sex and bodies are appropriate things to talk about in your family, which means that if they do experience sexual abuse, they are more likely to feel safe telling you about it.
Speaking of Sex
Hickling's book is organized into chapters according to the age of your child and specific concerns that parents might have. The New Speaking of Sex contains scientifically accurate explanations of body parts, the mechanics of sex and pregnancy and bodily changes during puberty. Speaking of Sex also contains information about other aspects of sexuality that children may ask questions about, such as miscarriages, vasectomies, Caesarean sections and homosexuality. Meg writes in a way that encourages open and honest communication about normal and healthy bodily functions, which can help parents feel more confident talking to their kids about sex.
Keeping Sexually Active Teens Safe
In addition to scientifically accurate information about bodily sexual functions and pregnancy, teens and young adults need information about sexually transmitted disease, how to tell when they're ready for a sexually active relationship and emotional health in sexually active relationships. Meg tackles all of these topics and more, including tips for parents trying to find the time and place to talk to their kids about sex and a comprehensive list of additional resources organized by age group and topic.
In an age when children and teens are confronted with sexualized images in the media every day, it is extremely important for parents to talk about sex in a clear, honest and confident way with their children. Avoiding discussion about sex doesn't keep children innocent for longer, but leaves them to form their own conclusions based on what they see and hear from their friends and the TV. Parents are the best source for honest answers and support for their kids, so take the time to talk to your kids about sex.
